Revising Writing With Feedback

Peer feedback comes from a classmate who reads or listens to your writing. A classmate might say, "I got confused when the story jumped to a new place." Teacher feedback often points out specific things to fix, like "your ending needs one more sentence" or "try a stronger word than \(good\)."

Both kinds of feedback are useful in different ways. A classmate tells you what a reader feels while reading your work. A teacher often gives you a clear next step. Using both helps you see your writing from more than one point of view.

Sometimes feedback tells you that a reader is confused. If a classmate says, "I do not know why the character was sad," your idea needs more explaining. You can revise by adding a sentence that tells the reason, such as "She was sad because she lost her favorite hat."

To revise for clearer ideas, reread the feedback and ask yourself, "What does the reader still need to know?" Then add or change sentences until the idea makes sense without you explaining it out loud.

Feedback about word choice usually points out words that are too plain or used too many times. If your teacher circles the word \(nice\) three times, that is a sign to replace it with words that show more exact meaning, like \(cheerful\), \(kind\), or \(surprising\).

Try this test: read a sentence and ask if the word paints a clear picture. "The dog was nice" tells very little. "The dog was gentle and playful" gives the reader a real picture. Strong word choice makes your writing more interesting to read.

Organization means your ideas are in an order that makes sense, like beginning, middle, and end. If a classmate says, "I got lost because the ending came before the middle," that is feedback about organization.

To fix organization, number your sentences or paragraphs in the order they should go. Then move any sentence that is out of place. A well-organized piece leads the reader from one idea smoothly to the next, without confusing jumps.

Here is a first draft sentence: "My trip was good and we did stuff." A classmate says, "I do not know what stuff means," and a teacher writes, "Try a more exact word than good."

Using both pieces of feedback, the writer revises to: "My trip was exciting because we hiked up a rocky trail and saw a waterfall." The idea is clearer, the word choice is stronger, and the sentence still fits in order with the rest of the story.

Peer feedback: Helpful comments from a classmate about your writing.

Teacher feedback: Helpful comments and suggestions from your teacher.

Revise: To change your writing to make ideas, words, or order better.

Ideas: The main thoughts and details a piece of writing is about.

Word choice: Picking exact and interesting words instead of plain ones.

Organization: The order that sentences and paragraphs are placed in.

Draft: An early version of your writing before it is revised.

Trade a short paragraph with a partner. Ask your partner to circle one sentence that is confusing and to underline one word that could be stronger. Then revise both spots.

Read your own draft out loud and count how many times you use the word \(good\), \(nice\), or \(fun\). Replace each one with a word that gives the reader a clearer picture.

Cut a paragraph into separate sentence strips. Mix them up, then put them back in the order that makes the most sense from beginning to end.

Related lessons

• Revision Using Feedback Improvement